I start:

flowers

Granted,But they smell like shit.

I want DE

Sure, but you'll only clean toilets.

I want to be DDT.

Sure, die and you will be DDT in heaven
I want Teddy

Granted but the teddy is made out of shit

I want a Rolex

Granted, but you'll have to give that ass monthly to pay it off.

I want DDT to be the best squad on the server.

Granted, but DDT doesn't even exist anymore

I want my Combine Harvester to fit inside a Pay'n'Spray

Granted, but once you get it in you cant get it out.
I want to get rich and buy a mansion.

Granted, but that mansion is made out of poop.
I want to be klo

Granted but you'll be their toilet cleaner.
I want to fuck Lord Farquaad

Granted but everytime u fuck lord Lord Farquaad your dick becomes smaller by 30%
I want a girlfriend

Granted, but she'll cheat on you.
I want DE.

Granted but u will get buttraped by all DE member everyday as long as u are DE
I want a Private Jet

Granted, but there will be a shitload of terrorists on your "private jet"

I want a lolly!

Granted, but it's made of poop
I want a Xbox

Granted, but you won't be able to play any games on it.
I want to have peace

Granted, but you have to join ISIS in their quest for world peace.
I want money.

Granted, but as long as you still play MTA you won't.
I want to lose my virginity..

Granted, but it needs to be the hand of your sleeping sister.
I want that being gay is accepted within this community

Granted , but you will have to become gay too
I want cigerettes to be free of cost

Granted, but ciguarets are for mans.
I want to join my elite genk ICE Police

Granted but Sam will rape your ass

I want admin

Granted but with admin comes 1000 ping
i want to get unbanned :(

Granted, but only in 2071.
I want @Bone to reset the server ASAP.